Annette's Story

On Wednesdays we share stories of widows. Here's a sweet lady I met a couple weeks ago. She was living in Tennessee when it happend, and now resides in Wisconsin.

"My name is Annette H. and I would like to tell you about how I became a widow.

My husband had not been in good health and I was always afraid that one day I would come home from work and he would have died without me being there. We found out in March of 2005 that my husband, Wilbur, had a spot on his lung. We lived in a small town that didn't have doctors that specialize in cancer. So his doctor sent him to Nashville and we met with different doctors in hopes to find one that would take my husband's case.

He was a smoker that had tried so hard to quit but was never able to. Doctors don't like to do anything for people who smoke, but we found a doctor who was willing to do the surgery. A new grandchild was due soon, so Wilbur didn't want to have the surgery until after our new grandchild was born. Our grandson was born June 22, 2005 and we went up to Wisconsin for a couple of weeks to spend with him.

After we came home he had the surgery on July 25th. He came out from the surgery doing great and everything was going so good until Sunday night. That night he was complaining of pain in his stomach and by morning the doctor put him in ICU. He called in another doctor and they took him down to do exploratory surgery to found out what was going on.

They had only been gone for about forty five minutes when a nurse came in the waiting room to get me. She took me to a quiet room to meet with the doctor. He told me things really didn't look too good for my husband. His heart had stopped beating but they were able to bring him back-- and what did I want him to do if it stopped again? I told him to do whatever it took.

The doctor came back within the hour to tell me that my husband had died on the operating table. It was so hard to believe because we were supposed to be going home that day. Instead, I was going home by myself with my brother and sister, who were at the hospital with me.

It was really hard to believe, and right after the doctor told me my husband was dead, my pastor walked in and was there with me. I was so thankful that he was there to help me thru that trying time. Wibur was a christian and I know he is with God. With all the suffering he did I wouldn't want him back in the shape he was.

After two months I made a big move from Tennessee to Wisconsin to be with my children and grandchildren. I know this is where I need to be but I think if I had to do it over again I might have taken a few more months to get thru my grieving period. We had been married for thirty five years and it was really hard for me to think about life without him. Moving up here and being with my grandchildren helped me to get thru it. The most important thing for my life was that God was by me thru it all. He was there in the night when I would wake and cry out in loneliness and He gave me such peace and joy. That is my story. I just hope that it will help someone else."     --Annette H.

I think it's wonderful that Annette was willing to share her story with me and you. Do you have any comments or insights into her statement about if she had it to do over again she might have waited a few more months before moving? Annette's come to terms with her move and change by now, but she thought it could be beneficial for others to consider it.

We'll look forward to hearing from you! Please click on the underlined word COMMENT below and that will open up a box for you to type in your thoughts. Thanks! ♥ ferree