Step 2: Prepare To Fail

What??!!!! Couldn't I come up with a worse title???!But I'll be honest here, there are days I fall off my plan! Vacations and changes in my work schedule trip me up, as do headaches and flu. And church stuff interferes, too!

If I sign up for a group Bible study I've found I have to choose between my personal Bible reading and the Bible study lessons. It's a tough choice, and at times I've tried to maintain both, but that doesn't work for me. I've got to go with my personal Bible reading or a group Bible study, not both.

All that to say this: take it easy on yourself! Especially while you're mourning. The latter part of my first year of widowhood I signed up for BSF. I quickly flunked out. BSF (Bible Study Fellowship) is a great program, but it was too much at that point. Aim instead to get through a grief support program like GriefShare or Widows Walk before you join a mainstream Bible study.

But back to the daily Bible reading. Let's say you're doing OK with it, keeping up fine, but then you hit Leviticus. . . or Zechariah . . . This is going to sound really unspiritual, but feel free to read somewhere else in the Bible reading plan, OK? Or pick up one of these books (which, coincidently, were each written by a widow). These books are on prayer, which goes hand-in-hand with your time with God:
31 Days of Praise, by Ruth Myers--Read these prayers out loud, because it's not only hard to read the Bible when you're mourning, it's also hard to pray. Somedays there are no words! Reading these prayers out loud reinforces them. Or you might just want to use the Lord's prayer, Matt. 6:9-13. Jesus really says it all in that prayer! Try going through it every day, emphasizing ONE word at a time: OUR Father . . . Our FATHER . . . Our Father IN HEAVEN . . . see what I mean?
Prayer Begins With Relationship, by Cynthia Bezek This is a new Bible study about prayer with 6 chapters you can take at your own pace, allowing about a week per chapter. It will help you begin to listen to God and to recognize His voice. If you've ever felt left out when people start saying, "The Lord told me . . ." then you'll want to get hold of this book.

And sometimes you just have to quit trying so hard. Keep committed to your time with God, but pick up a classic piece of fiction. I don't know why, but Hinds Feet On High Places, Pilgrims Progress and an unusual little book by C.S. Lewis, The Great Divorce have been helpful to widows. As you read one of these, maintain the physical habit of a quiet time. Then pick back up on the Bible reading. Don't try to catch up, just start on the current date. No one is grading you, not even God.

Keep trying new routines until you find one that fits. And if you flunk out of BSF, etc. remember that I did, too; or if you can't seem to stay on your plan, remember I have those days, too--but they get farther apart and it's worth it. I know it's frustrating, but grief is a time of transition and adjustment. God is creating something new in your life---and it's you! Beauty will rise from these ashes. You'll begin to find some good. You'll live with far greater passion and life will become precious and rich again.

Come back tomorrow for the key to looking forward to your quiet time with God. And THANK YOU, SUE for being #97! Getting so close to 100 members make me feel like a kid on Christmas morning!
 ♥ ferree