Rebekah's At It Again

Here on the WCP, Fridays come automatically loaded with permission to lighten up and laugh! It's good for the soul! Thanks again to Rebekah for collecting these riddles, jokes and puns.

What do you get when you put a lion and baby elk together? 
A full lion.

What did the chimpanzee say when his sister had a baby?
Well, I'll be a monkey's uncle.

A grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartenders says to him, 'hey we have a drink named after you!'  The grasshopper says 'why would you name a drink Carl?'

A monkey's uncle

There were two ships. One had red paint, one had blue paint. They collided. At last report, the survivors were marooned.

I used to work at an orange juice factory, but I was canned because I couldn't concentrate.

I used to be a nun, but I got expelled because of my dirty habits.

I fired my masseuse today. She just rubbed me the wrong way.
♥ ferree

P.S. Welcome to  Lori, Justine, Sheila, and another beautiful reader---thanks for joining the following. May the Lord bless you.