Wednesday, September 5, 2012

Porchlight Series: A Prompt For Your Stories

(Since I'm travelling most of this month I'm re-posting some of my favorites. This Porchlight Series will be every Wednesday. On Wednesdays I post widows' stories and what I love about Porchlight is that it tells YOUR stories as readers answer the questions and correspond in the comment boxes. I hope you'll appreciate these stories as much as I do, and I hope to hear from you!)

*Finding Your Way *
I called ahead to confirm our reservation at a small cabin. I was worried. We were late and the mountain roads were throwing us some tight curves and steep cliffs. Night was falling, and shadows swallowed up the river valleys and rock-sided heights as the sun started to sink behind the Rockies. “I’ll leave a light on for you,” the good-natured host assured me.

Those are good words to hear when you’re in a new place and darkness is setting in. Your gracious host knows you may be shuffling around, not sure of where you’re going. Whether you’re arriving at a destination vacation, or shuffling down the hall to the bathroom at your mother’s new home for the very first time, those simple words promise guidance. It’s good comfort to know someone who’s familiar with the area is looking out for you.

So it is with life. We all need people who have been there to “leave a light on” for us. Their stories help light our paths so we can find our way through a dark night.

Tell a bit of your story using the questions below. Click on the comment box where I've reproduced the questions, and answer any ones you'd like. You can copy and paste them right into your own comment box.

Some are just warm-up questions for fun. With the others your answers will help light the path for someone else. Don't feel you have to give the "right" answer. The only right answers are honest ones! Grief is different for everyone, so your input is very valuable. And it'll be great to get to know others who also follow this blog.

1) Name your favorite vacation spot

2) What is your favorite way to travel: plane, train, car, bus, bike, walk, or camel caravan?

3) Which do you prefer: a well-planned vacation, or no schedules and lots of spontaneity?

4) Surpises! Do you like them or hate them? Why?

5) What has surprised you the most since your husband died?

6) What is one thing you would tell a new widow?

Thanks for sharing!

9 comments:

  1. Hi! I look forward to your answers! Just use your cursor to copy all these questions. Paste them into your comment box. Answer the ones you want to, and delete the others. Thanks!

    1) Name your favorite vacation spot

    2) What is your favorite way to travel: plane, train, car, bus, bike, walk, or camel caravan?

    3) Which do you prefer: a well-planned vacation, or no schedules and lots of spontaneity?

    4) Surpises! Do you like them or hate them? Why?

    5) What has surprised you the most since your husband died?

    6) What is one thing you would tell a new widow?

    ReplyDelete
  2. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  3. 1) Name your favorite vacation spot - DESTIN, FL

    2) What is your favorite way to travel: plane, train, car, bus, bike, walk, or camel caravan? I LOVE TO TRAVEL BY CAR TO BE ABLE TO REALLY TAKE IN ALL OF THE SCENERY AND TO STOP AT THOSE OUT OF THE WAY PLACES. BUT, I ALSO LIKE TO TRAVEL BY PLANE BECAUSE IT MAKES ME FEEL CLOSER TO GOD AND MY HUSBAND WHEN I'M WAY UP THERE IN THE SKY. IT HELPS ME SEE THAT ALL THE THINGS GOING ON DOWN HERE ON EARTH ARE SO MINUTE COMPARED TO HEAVEN.

    3) Which do you prefer: a well-planned vacation, or no schedules and lots of spontaneity? BEFORE MY HUSBAND MOVED TO HEAVEN I LIKED A WELL-PLANNED VACATION. NOW I WOULD RATHER HAVE NO SCHEDULE AND JUST DO WHAT I FEEL LIKE DOING.

    4) Surpises! Do you like them or hate them? Why? I HAVE ALWAYS LOVED SURPRISES, BUT RARELY EXPERIENCE THEM.

    5) What has surprised you the most since your husband died? HOW HARD, LONG, AND UNPREDICTABLE THIS GRIEF JOURNEY IS.

    6) What is one thing you would tell a new widow? DON'T RUN FROM GRIEF.

    ReplyDelete
  4. 1) Name your favorite vacation spot : right here at home - for now it is safe haven from the world out here- but in the future I would love to go to the ocean - either one - being in the Midwest I really miss the ocean.

    2) What is your favorite way to travel: plane, train, car, bus, bike, walk, or camel caravan?
    The train or the bus - really like someone else doing the driving. Would go in a car if somebody else did all the driving!

    3) Which do you prefer: a well-planned vacation, or no schedules and lots of spontaneity? A peaceful and quiet no scheduled vacation..
    Somewhere in between - having a general idea of where I am going but not on a rigid schedule so if I want to spend more time somewhere I can do so.

    4) Surpises! Do you like them or hate them? Why?
    I absolutely love surprises - receiving them and giving them - they brighten the day and seem to be that little "extra" hug from God.

    ) What has surprised you the most since your husband died?
    Several things: That I have survived 14 months. That God is an awesome husband and that this new relationship with Him is a new daily experience. That learning to live without Ken is so very difficult. I was prepared for his death (had two years) but I was not at all prepared for my life after his death. And truthfully there is no way to prepare for it either.

    6) What is one thing you would tell a new widow? Hold on to Christ and when it feels like you can't remember He is holding on to you. You have suffered a tremendous emotional and spiritual injury - you need time to heal - give yourself that time - take care of yourself - don't judge yourself alongside those who seem to be making more "progress" than you are - join Lifeboat - read as much as you can - refer to Ferree's book list on WCP - stay in the Word - go to the blogs written by widows(there is a list here on WCP which is a good place to start). Sorry that's more than one thing - but they are all necessary.

    ReplyDelete
  5. 1) Name your favorite vacation spot
    Anywhere near water. And hopefully Alaska next year.

    2) What is your favorite way to travel: plane, train, car, bus, bike, walk, or camel caravan? My husband and I often traveled by train, and we did a lot of road trips in the car...but now my cozy little RV is the only way to travel.

    3) Which do you prefer: a well-planned vacation, or no schedules and lots of spontaneity? I used to plan a lot when we only had a week or two. Now I plan a little, just so that I am not left stranded in the middle of nowhere.

    4) Surpises! Do you like them or hate them? Why? Surprises are ok, I have luckily always adapted well to change.

    5) What has surprised you the most since your husband died? Feeling left out, forgotten, friends not around.

    6) What is one thing you would tell a new widow? Ask for what you need and ask again or ask someone else if you don't get the answer you need the first time.

    Thanks for sharing!

    Thanks Ferree, I like this idea.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Hi Teri, I really like this idea too because I enjoyed hearing everyone ideas. I think a lot of people would be surprised to hear some of these things, but they make perfect sense to other widows.

    ReplyDelete
  7. 1) Name your favorite vacation spot? I don't reallly have a favorite vacation spot, just want to be away from the hustle and bustle of city life when I'm on holiday.

    2) What is your favorite way to travel: plane, train, car, bus, bike, walk, or camel caravan? Since i get car sick when i travel long distances, I would prefer to travel by plane.

    3) Which do you prefer: a well-planned vacation, or no schedules and lots of spontaneity? I would prefer to plan well in advance for my holidays.

    4) Surpises! Do you like them or hate them? The response to a surprise would be very much dependent on what type of surprise it is.

    5) What has surprised you the most since your husband died? Since my husband has just died a month ago, i've been surprised at how i've been able to cope emotionally when i'm at work. I'm also surprised at how I've decided to not ask why me but to submit to GOD's will. I've come to accept that there is nothing that i could have done to make my husband stay on earth longer and everything is according to his plans.

    6) What is one thing you would tell a new widow?
    Continue to praise and thank GOD for the many blessings in your life.GOD loves you and he is waiting for you to bring your burdens, questions and sorrows to him.He is the only one that can be your source of strength and peace during this difficult time.He has promised that he would not forsake you.Take your time with your healing process, if you need to cry, please do cry, if you need to talk please do share. People heal differently so do not compare yourself to others.We may not see it now but GOD only has our best interest at heart, so what we must do is just be more submissive to him.

    ReplyDelete
  8. 7 one thing I would tell a new widow is Jeremiah 29 verse 11 still holds. Despite losing a husband the plans of God for widows does not change in any way. Because as a widow you still need to make decisions,to raise up children still to go to work, you still remain a mother, a christian,a neighbor an aunt, a daughter etc.since it is only one area of our life ; the married life that is affected but other areas of our lives still remain the same thus; we still need the sustaining power of God. Hence we need him to protect us, establish us, prosper us and even more; give us a future

    ReplyDelete
  9. There's so much godly wisdom here in your comments. I wish all widows could know the Lord the same way.

    ReplyDelete

Thank you for taking the time to comment. I am not always able to reply but your remarks mean a lot to me and will appear as soon as possible.

Here are some tips for commenting:
Remember to click the Publish button when you are done.
Choosing the anonymous identity is easiest if you do not have your own blog.
Using a computer rather than a cell phone seems to work better. Thanks again!